Once

My favorite movie this year was an Irish movie called Once.  In fact, I saw it twice, bought the soundtrack for myself and someone else, and bought the DVD.  I was on cloud nine last night when one of the songs won an Oscar for best original song:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ck_c40EdLFE and http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XzQRuTwaFI8&feature=related.  Although "Falling Slowly" won the Oscar, my favorite song from the movie is "If You Want Me" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T5aYcsksJ0s

It is a simple story about two people who accidentally meet and share their love of music.  I consider it a love story because they become the best of friends.  Even their acceptance speeches were worth watching and listening to their message.  For me, they were the models of authenticity--so real.  In the end, what do we really want from a partner:  someone to listen about us, care about us, and with whom we share some common interests.

The movie ends in a way that makes me think they could make a sequel.  I think there will be a Twice. Once is not enough from this dynamic duo.

An Attitude of Gratitude

I have realized in my training to be a certified sage-ing leader that an attitude of gratitude is one of the keys to aging gracefully.  Focusing on what we are thankful for rather than complaining about what is not going our way is a much more positive mind-set. 

In order to instill this point, I have advocate keeping a gratitude journal.  Document everything large and small for which you are grateful.  I also believe in writing letters (hand write not email) to specific people you want to thank for helping you along the way.  Jim Autry, one of the pioneers of the spirit at work movement and author of Love and Profit, talks about how he takes gratitude walks at which time he reminds himself of all of the things in his life for which he is thankful.

Attitude is a choice and we can choose to be grateful.  But we need to make this a habit.  In this busy world in which we live, it is easy to forget about what really is important in life.  I also think the small things can make a big difference. 

Women STILL Can't Win

I am writing this as Hillary is losing ground and momentum in the presidential campaign.  While I am not saying she was my candidate, I am feeling as if women just can't win regardless of the woman.  I have heard many people say, "I would vote for a woman, but just not Hillary." 

In a recent New York Times, an article pointed out the challenges women continue to face in leadership.  Research has demonstrated that when women highlight their accomplishments, people are turned off.  And women seem even more offended by self-promoting females than men are.

So much of this has to do with perceptions that have not changed much over the decades.  Another example is that a woman can be perceived as competent or as likable, but not both.  According to Rosabeth Moss Kanter, a Harvard Business School professor who is recognized as an expert on women in leadership, women face much more scrutiny on many more dimensions than men such as how they look, what they wear, and even their hairstyles. 

Some studies have found that it is a disadvantage for women to be physically attractive when applying for management positions.  Beautiful applicants received lower ratings!

It appears that it is hard to be everything for everyone and women still cannot win.  Regardless of how competent we are, the challenges are immense.  All women should respect the relentless commitment made by Hillary to forge new paths for us.  If Hillary wins, the win is much bigger than what we might even imagine.  Time will tell. 

A Tribute to Ray Andrews

On January 15, 2008, I was honored to have my editorial printed in the Des Moines Register.  It was a tribute to Ray Andrews, my photography teacher, who died in November.  I was moved by the thought that I could not just let Ray slip away.  He was such an unassuming and modest man.  He shunned attention and lived life simply.  But Ray was powerful in his own way because of his knowledge of black and white photography.  We were going to set up my darkroom this winter and now that has been on hold.  I think of him often and now I am blogging about him hoping that this message reaches him in the blogosphere.  More people need to know who he was and the contributions he left behind in those of us who have fond memories of his teaching and of his work.  He is the Ansel Adams I was lucky enough to know.  This is for you Ray. 

Fondly.  Jann

Unanswered Questions

What are the questions that you wish you could ask someone before it is too late?  Is there someone in particular to whom you would like to ask these questions?  In the book, Questions for My Father:  Finding the Man Behind Your Dad by Vincent Saniforth, he tells us the questions that he wished he had asked his dad.

• How can we use this thinking to help us before it is too late? 
• Who is the sage in your life with whom you need to have this conversation? 
• How can we capture the wisdom? 
• Who does this make you want to call?

Sent vs. Go

I was reading a book the other day and it differentiated between the words “sent” and “go.”  It said that to go means to leave, untethered, let loose.  “Being sent” means you’ve got support.  You have a home and you have a purpose.  While you can always come back, being sent means people love you.

We have a son who is a senior in college and I immediately thought of him.  We need to send him out into the world to carve a new life for himself.  While it is scary because of all of the unknowns, we need to remember not to tell him to “go,” but that we are lovingly sending him out knowing that he has our love and support. 

This struck me as an interesting difference that I wanted to share.

Learning about Leadership from Dogs

Based on the book Why Dogs Wag Their Tales:  Lessons Leaders Can Learn About Work, Joy, and Life by Sherri McArdle and Jim Ramerman, we can learn to be more effective leaders from dogs.  They explore the relationships between leaders and their dogs in order to translate that to relationships with employees.  In using this metaphor, they believe it is “less about differences and more about the similarities in how we learn best.”  Some of their dog-mas include:

·         Dogs are pack animals.  Leaders need to pay attention and give employees the leadership they need.   Just like dogs, people need leaders to help them understand their role in the pack.

·         Training is essential.  The best training comes from on-the-job experiences.  This includes coaching, mentoring, and providing feedback.

·         Dogs give immediate feedback.  When their tails are wagging, you know they are happy.  If we all received fast feedback in the workplace, we could learn and grow at such a fast pace.

·         Dogs find happiness in anything.  We should help people do the same.

McArdle points out, “Professionally, I believe that the ability to keep our hearts open and remain calm helps us think clearly, act decisively, and remember that all business results are made possible through people.

Differentiate Using Customer Service

I'm in a carpool and today the conversation was on BAD customer service.  With advances in technology, the four of us agreed that customer service has suffered.  I explained how I spent about three hours trying to download a test bank because companies don't send you hard copies anymore.  Everything is on-line.  But the challenge is figuring out how to make it work.  After three hours and one more hour with the College technical person (who downloads documents all of the time), we called the technical support person.  Do you think we could get to a live person? We were routed in various directions with no luck in getting a person or answer to our question. 

They also instruct you to send in your question via email.  But they want to prompt you to different links and it is hard to even know which link to select.  Last summer, I had similar issues with electronic course materials and the textbook representative immediately connected me to a real person who was a technical expert.  He spent three hours figuring out the program and said to me, "This is not even easy for me and this is my expertise!"

Another colleague chimed in that she was ordering a ticket using Travelocity.  When she hit a key requesting to speak to an agent, the recording informed her that it would cost her $25 to speak to a live person! 

If companies want to differentiate themselves, move away from technology and offer personal service from live persons.  If it makes a difference for customers, it should make a difference for businesses--profit and not-for-profit.