It is all about behaviors
I read a great review of Marshall Goldsmith's book What Got You Here Won't Get You There which made me want to read the book. Our leadership effectiveness really has to do with behaviors. Goldsmith is wonderful for cutting to the chase and making things easy to understand. It is not surprising that he a successful corporate coach. To summarize:
1. Winning too much: The need to win at all costs and in all situations - when it matters, when it doesn't, and when it's totally beside the point.
2. Adding too much value: The overwhelming desire to add our two cents to every discussion.
3. Passing judgment: The need to rate others and impose our standards on them.
4. Making destructive comments: The needless sarcasms and cutting remarks that we think make us sound sharp and witty.
5. Starting with "No," "But," or "However": The overuse of these negative qualifiers which secretly say to everyone, "I'm right. You're wrong."
6. Telling the world how smart we are: The need to show people we're smarter than they think we are.
7. Speaking when angry: Using emotional volatility as a management tool.
8. Negativity, or "Let me explain why that won't work": The need to share our negative thoughts even when we weren't asked.
9. Withholding information: The refusal to share information in order to maintain an advantage over others.
10. Failing to give proper recognition: The inability to praise and reward.
11. Claiming credit that we don't deserve: The most annoying way to overestimate our contribution to any success.
12. Making excuses: The need to reposition our annoying behavior as a permanent fixture so people excuse us for it.
13. Clinging to the past: The need to deflect blame away from ourselves and onto events and people from our past; a subset of blaming everyone else.
14. Playing favorites: Failing to see that we are treating someone unfairly.
15. Refusing to express regret: The inability to take responsibility for our actions, admit we're wrong, or recognize how our actions affect others.
16. Not listening: The most passive-aggressive form of disrespect for our colleagues.
17. Failing to express gratitude: The most basic form of bad manners.
18. Punishing the messenger: The misguided need to attack the innocent who are usually only trying to help us.
19. Passing the buck: The need to blame everyone but ourselves.
20. An excessive need to be "me": Exalting our faults as virtues simply because they're who we are.
Bonus 21: Goal Obsession: The force at play when we get so wrapped up in achieving our goal that we do it at the expense of a larger mission.It sounds so simple.
Since behaviors are learned, where did we learn to behave in these ways?
Why are some of these things so hard to do?
Why do we have to remind ourselves NOT to behave in these ways?
![Reblog this post [with Zemanta]](http://img.zemanta.com/reblog_e.png?x-id=68a8d952-7c3c-48a8-911a-6611a13c50c0)
Hi Dr. Freed--
Why don't you head a leadership minor or something on campus? What a success that would be. I have never had you as a professor until now, but now I'm wishing I would have had more classes with you...you are full of wisdom, encouragement, and insight. I love your "pondering" questions. Its just a thought...I'm in love with your blog!
Posted by: Steph Torgeson | February 02, 2010 at 03:29 PM
Thanks Steph. I am still getting used to the blog. It seems self-centerted to promote it, but if I don't then people don't know. I have found that writing posts helps me think and look for things to share in the classroom. So I learn things to share on the blog to it is all integrated. Writing the blog has improved my writing skills and made me faster at producing work. But I like comments and I appreciate your idea. If you are not a senior, can you take my leadership course in the fall? Thanks
Posted by: Jann Freed | February 02, 2010 at 03:52 PM