Jann's Blog

Blogging as Legacy Work

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Legacy work is an important component of positive aging or sage-ing.  Thinking about what we are leaving to the people we love and to our communities is vital to growing in wisdom.  So many times retirement planning is about financial planning and legacy is about distributing our financial assets.

The legacy work to which I am referring has to do with values, dreams, purpose, making a difference.  Part of helping us do the kind of internal exploration needed is journaling.  The process of journaling helps us reflect on our life experiences and supports our ongoing growth.  It can take on many forms--whatever is best for you.  In workshops, I often recommend writing your life story for families.  With the emergence of self-publishing, people can write their own books to be passed on for generations.

This leads me to blogging.  Someone asked me the other day why I was blogging and I even surprised myself with my response.  "In case I die, I want my sons to know what I was thinking, doing, and how I was feeling about various topics that usually include leading, living, and learning." 

I continue to warn my sons and my students about cyberspace and how we have to be so careful about what we post. The October issue of Vanity Fair says "Every search, every posting, every text message or Twitter, leaves a cyber footprint."  Or as someone told me, "Getting something off of the Internet (Facebook, email, Twitter) is like trying to get pee out of a swimming pool--impossible." 

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But now I am thinking about this all differently.  I am blogging about things that I want to be "out there" long after I am gone. Oprah has her column in every issue called "What I Know For Sure" so that we know what she knows for sure.  Just as I try to read every book by one of my heroes, William Sloane Coffin, because I want to know what he thought about different issues.  And my husband is a Warren Buffet follower and reads every book by and about Buffett in order to understand his thinking and philosophy on investments. 

So if something happens to me, regardless of the number of people who are reading my posts (Sounds like Julie in Julie and Julia, doesn't it?), I am writing these posts knowing that whatever I am writing will probably outlive me.  This is what I want the world to know about ...

So if you are reading, please tell me what you are thinking.  Challenge me.  Let me know if you agree.  But if I don't hear from you, I will keep thinking, reading, and sharing.  Blogging is part of my legacy work. 

What I Will Remember

Leadership may be common sense, but it is not common practice.  Why are there so many bad leaders in times when we need good leaders the most? 

Effective leadership is not about being nice.  It is about being fair, honest, acting out of compassion and empathy and not fear.  I want to remember this during thes uncertain times.  Pay attention to the people around you because leadership is ultimately about relationships. 

One book I highly recommend that emphasizes these points is Resonant Leadership by Boyatzis and McKee.

What I Will Remember

It is more important to be interested than interesting.  What is the difference?  When people are interesting, the focus is on them.  When people are interested, the focus is on others. 

Could it be that if people are interested in others that they then become interesting?  I will remember that to be interested in other people, places, and things is a key to living a quality life.

What I Will Remember

In my opinion, one of the main strengths of a leader is to admit a limitation or mistake.  We are human and we make mistakes.  We are vulnerable and people want to know we are human--just like them.  So why is this so hard for so many people in leadership positions? 

I will remember that I do not know all of the answers and that I am vulnerable.  This is a strength that most people appreciate.

What I Will Remember

We are human beings not human doings.  Yet, we get so caught up in the doing rather than the being.  I want to remember to focus on the being.  What does this mean?  Be present.  Be aware.  Be compassionate.  Be here now. 

It's how you make someone feel ...

What I will remember is that how you make someone feel can last a long time--good or bad.  Everyone likes to share quotes and here is one of my favorites.  While I don't know where I heard it, the quote is something like this:

"People won't remember what you said.  They won't remember what you did.  But they will remember how you made them feel."

How true this is!  Think about the last time you felt angry, hurt, or frustrated and you can probably associate a person with the situation.  You will remember that person for the way s/he made you feel.

Power of the Ego

An executive coach defined ego as "the difference between what you want and what is."  The ego is powerful and can creep up in some negative behaviors.  Eckhart Tolle, author of Power of Now, talks a lot about the ego in his book A New Earth.  I will remember that the "dark side of the ego" is not a good thing and it is worth paying attention to make sure the ego is in balance.